My Movie Ideas: "The Princess Bride" Reimagined

UPDATE August 9, 2022:
Forget everything I originally said. I was young and dumb and didn't know what I was talking about when I originally wrote it. At the beginning of this year (2022) I finally read "The Princess Bride" novel. Reading the novel made me understand just how perfect the movie is. The novel claims to be an abridgment of a historical tome only focusing on "the good parts" of the story. The movie does the same, only focusing on the good parts of the novel. Also, the actors are cast so perfectly that the characters in the movie are improvements over their book counterparts. There is no way the characters could ever be recast. So while the book could be readapted into a TV series, or the movie could be "reimagined" like I suggested five years ago, it just won't have the magic of the 1987 movie.

Half of the novel, though, is William Goldman's fictional account of his history with the fictional "The Princess Bride" tome and first abridging it and then adapting it into a movie script. A movie or TV series could be made about that.

ORIGINAL August 9, 2017:

Nostalgia for the 1980s and 1990s with lots of movies and TV shows from that time being revived or rebooted. One movie that will more than likely be remade sooner than later is "The Princess Bride", and this is how it should be done:

"The Princess Bride" is a movie about The Grandfather (Peter Falk) reading a book to The Grandson (Fred Savage). What we see as the movie is what The Grandson is picturing in his head as The Grandfather reads to him. So for "The Princess Bride" reimagined, The Grandson is now The Father reading the story to his son, and so it will be the same story with different actors because a new character is imagining what they look like. (Most characters can be recast; Billy Crystal, Carol Kane, and Wallace Shawn MUST reprise their characters.)


My other idea would be a Princess Bride 2. Not a full movie, but something like a Funny or Die sketch. Westley (Cary Elwes) and Buttercup (Robin Wright) have been married for 30 years. Their kids are now grown and have moved out of the house. It has been years since since Westley told Buttercup "As you wish." They are considering getting a divorce. Before they do, they go to Miracle Max (Billy Crystal) for counseling. Except Max is not much help because he continuously bickers with Valerie (Carol Kane). Westley and Buttercup get up to leave, but Max and Valerie tell them that they still love each other after being married for 115 years, even if they fight all the time. Westley and Buttercup leave realizing that their problems aren't as bad as they thought.

Matt Smith for Willy Wonka

Today "Harry Potter" producer David Heyman and Warner Bros. announced that they were going to make a young Willy Wonka movie. If this has to happen can we get a British actor in the role? After thinking about this, I realized that former "Doctor Who" Matt Smith would be perfect in the role of the young candy maker!

Why I Am Still Hesitant About "Fantastic Beasts"

I am a big fan of Harry Potter. I have read all of the books. The movies are the only major film franchise that I have seen all movies in the theater. I participate in Pottermore, listen the the MuggleCast podcast, and used to be active in Harry Potter message board forums. I was excited to hear that J.K. Rowling would be writing movies set in the wizarding world, but over the last year I have become more and more hesitant about the upcoming "Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them" movies.

The EW Synopsis

In November 2015, "Entertainment Weekly" had a cover story about "Fantastic Beasts" and included the following synopsis:

Eccentric magizoologist Newt Scamander ... comes to New York (for a reason we won’t disclose) with his trusty weathered case. This case is one of those way-way-way-bigger-on-the-inside magical devices, and within are expansive habitats for a collection of rare and endangered magical creatures from Newt’s travels around globe. He discovers the American wizarding community is fearfully hiding from Muggles (who are called “No-Maj” in the States, ...) and the threat of public exposure is an even graver concern than in the UK (remember the Salem witch trials?). Fantastic Beasts is the story of what happens when this uniquely skilled English wizard travels to wiz-phobic America and a variety of his creatures, some quite dangerous … get out of their case.
Emphasis Mine

For a movie set in America, it seems to be very anti-American. First, it seems Americans are too stupid to understand an word like "Muggles" and instead they call no magic people "No-Maj"s. It's possible it was only 1920s slang, but I still don't like the term. Second, the synopsis describes America as wiz-phobic, which I will discuss in a later point.

"Harry Potter and the Cursed Child"

The next part of my concern came after the opening of "Harry Potter and the Cursed Child". It is called the "eighth Harry Potter story", though it was not written by playwright Jack Thorne, not J.K. Rowling. Rowling insists that it should be considered canon, despite the fact that it continually contradicts her original stories. This is not the place for my review of "Cursed Child", but the fact that J.K. Rowling approved this terrible story to be part of her created world does not help ease my fears about her other upcoming additions.

The Story

My biggest source of apprehension is in the story. It's called "Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them" and does feature Newt Scamander, the author of the textbook the movie get's its name from, and does show magical creatures but it seems that there are two other stories as well.

Ever since the EW synopsis, it has seemed that they are going to be using "wiz-phobia" as a metaphor for "homophobia". Openly gay actor Ezra Miller is playing Credence Barebone, an adopted son of the leader of the anti-wizard "Second Salem Society" and who is probably secretly a wizard. Auror Percival Graves tells Credence about his mother's group, "If they succeed, we will be forced to stay in the shadows forever. And we've both lived in the shadows too long." That takes on a double meaning if wizardry is being used as a metaphor for the LGBT lifestyle. My problem with that is that is the X-Men movies thing. The wizarding world already contains messages about racism. They don't need to steal X-Men's analogy as well.

And now it seems that "Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them" is actually going to be five movies that are going to depict the wizarding world's war against the dark wizard Grindlewald. This seems like a bait-and-switch, or at the very least major retconning. We know that Dumbledore defeats Grindlewald. Are they now going to say that Newt Scamander was involved as well? Or is the four sequels going to shift away from Newt's story and be about other characters? The character poster for Graves contains a Deathly Hallows symbol necklace. At the time the symbol was known as Grindlewald's mark. He may be the link to the Dumbledore-Grindlewald story. At first it made me think that he will be revealed to be on Grindlewald's side, but Percival is the name of Dumbledore's father and is also Albus's first (of three) middle names.

Canon

And finally, my concern is how the movies fit into the Harry Potter cannon. We have the seven books, the eight movies, and one play. The movies are not canon because they contain many differences from the books. The same goes for the play (see above). "Fantastic Beasts" are movies only, but they are written by J.K. Rowling, so how do they fit? For example, the Lumos Maxima spell was created in the movies, but it is also used in "Fantastic Beasts". If "Cursed Child" divided Potter fans over what is considered canon, these movies will only complicate things.
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I really want want the "Fantastic Beasts" quintilogy (is that a word?)* to be good. I just have many reservations about them. I hope the first movie proves me wrong!

*The correct word is pentalogy.

Live-Action Mulan Director Suggestion

Earlier this week, Disney announced that they are working on a live-action adaptation of their 1998 movie "Mulan". "Mulan" is in my Top-3 Disney Animation movies, if not #1. My favorite part is the song "I'll Make A Man Out Of You".


Reportedly, Disney offered the director's role to "Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon" director Ang Lee, who turned it down. So Disney is continuing their search for a Chinese director to take the helm. I have a suggestion, someone who was associated with the animated "Mulan" and who has a lot of directing experience though that is not what they are primarily know for.

Jackie Chan was the speaking and singing voice for Li Shang in the 1998 "Mulan", and he has directed 15 movies in China. He also could portray Mulan's father Fa Zhou.

I hope that Disney is at least considering Chan for the director's job. But I trust that whoever the hire will be the right person for the job.

My Movie Ideas: Live-Action Curious George Casting

I'm getting tired of coming up with a movie or TV show idea, keeping it to myself, and then seeing the idea come to life and not getting any credit for it. For instance, certain plot points included in "Star Wars: The Force Awakens" are very similar to the story I came up with playing "Star Wars Episode VII" with my Star Wars Legos when I was 9 in 1999. After watching "Man of Steel", I said that the follow up to "Star Trek Into Darkness" needed to bring back Chris Hemsworth as George Kirk - which is happening in the follow up to "Star Trek Beyond". I also came up with the basic idea behind "Hannah Montana" in 2000 and a similar concept to "LOST" in 2003.

For the last year, I've been saying that there should be a live-action "Curious George" movie with Andy Serkis playing George and James Franco playing The Man In The Yellow Hat.

https://www.facebook.com/groups/Schmoeville/permalink/1077729192310000/?comment_id=1077737945642458

Today news broke that a live-action "Curious George" is going to be made. No cast has been announced yet. But if either one of my casting choices is used, I am going to demand Universal give me an executive producer credit, and the standard union payment amount that come with it.

I am going to try to stay a head of the curve and start posting my movie ideas to this blog. Maybe one day I will get the Hollywood credit I deserve.

Opinion: Five Movies That Need A Sequel

It seems like nearly every movie that comes out each year is either a sequel or the start of a franchise that that will have sequels. Sometimes, though, great movies just don't get sequels. Here are five movies I think really need sequels:

Get Smart (2008)

Why it needs a sequel:
After the first movie came out, a sequel was rumored to be scheduled for a 2012 release. Steve Carell wrote a draft of the script, but there was never one good enought to be made into a movie.

What it could be about:
As a movie adapted from a T.V. series, there are probably a lot of ways a sequel could go. Sigfried probably didn't die, so KAOS is probably still out there. Another possibility could be a "Bruce and Lloyd: Out of Control" meets "Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D." type T.V. series with cameos from Steve Carell, Terry Crews, David Koechner, Patrick Warburton, and Larry Miller. The problem with that idea is that currently Masi Oka is currently on two TV series, and until I did research for writing this I thought that Nate Torrence hadn't done any acting after "Get Smart".

The Italian Job (2003)

Why it needs a sequel:
Another movie with sequel that was in development ever since the first movie came out. A couple scripts were written, but a movie was never green-lit. With the increasing popularity of the "Fast and Furious" movies there is a market for another heist movie with fast cars.

What it could be about:
The sequel war rumored to be called "The Brazilian Job". Since "Fast Five" pretty much is that concept, there are many possibilities for a story for a sequel. Have the crew been pulling jobs over the last decade plus, or does something happen to pull them out of retirement for "one last score"?

Galaxy Quest (1999)

Why it needs a sequel:
At the same time a parody and loving homage to "Star Trek", "Galaxy Quest" was ranked along with the official "Star Trek" movies and was placed in the middle of the list at the offical Star Trek convention in 2013. People still love the movie even a decade-and-a-half later.

What it could be about:
Since the first movie parodied the "Star Trek" TV series, a sequel could parody the movies - especially the reboots. "Galaxy Quest" is being turned into movie - but with an all-new, younger cast. How do the original cast members react to that, and how do the new cast members react to being caught up in an actual adventure in space when the Thermians return?

The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy (2005)

Why it needs a sequel:
In my opinion, the "HGttG" movie is one of the few movies that are better than the book, although it is really the next in a line of adaptations of a story that inlude a radio series, a book series, a TV series, a stage play, a computer game, and finally a movie, all differing from the other somewhat, and all written by Douglas Adams.

What it could be about:
The rest of the series.

The Game Plan (2007)

Why it needs a sequel:
If a direct sequel were put into development today, filmed in 2016, and released in 2017, it would be ten years after the original came out. The first movie was about Joe Kingman (Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson, a single pro football player finding out he had an eight-year-old daughter, Peyton (Madison Pettis). The sequel would be about a (possibly married) former pro football player with an 18-year-old daughter. We would see how fatherhood has caused Joe's character to change over time, if Joe and Monique (Roselyn Sanchez) lasted as a couple, and what the spunky Peyton is now like as a teenager.

What it could be about:
The movie could be about Joe and Peyton going on a road trip and visiting colleges. That plot line seems vaguely familiar, so I do some research and it turns out I am remembering seeing commercial for another Disney movie called "College Road Trip" from 2008. So Disney could make two sequels with one movie.